Gem Jar Date

Emma has a gem jar. When she makes good choices, she gets to put in a gem. When she makes bad choices, she has to take a gem out. (Time outs were not working for her, she needs to SEE consequences, good and bad.) She has to/gets to tell us what the gem is for (ie: washing off the table, getting jammies on fast, or yelling at dad, throwing her shoes, etc.) and puts in or takes out the gem herself. It is amazing to see how much a little glass rock can make her understand her own behavior.

Emma worked really hard and filled up her jar. So, as a reward, she got to pick something to do as a date with mom or dad. She is a smart girl and picked "both!" She also got to pick what she wanted to do. She went back and forth a lot about this. She finally decided, and feeding the ducks just barely won over going to the fun center.

 Not  a single duck ate any of the bread she tossed. Luckily, she didn't mind, and then we played at the park.

The key (besides remembering to use the gems) is lots of praise. (The three positives to one negative rule!) Andrew and Tyler have both wondered about also earning gems. This was a little bit hard to figure out. I finally came to the conclusion that the gems are like a treat or sticker type of reward for potty training. They are only used for a little bit to establish the correct behavior. I did tell Andrew and Tyler they will have individual chances to go on special activities (they don't want them called dates) with mom and dad, but they don't need the gems.